Bookda Gheisar begins her story by stating that although she has lived in United States for thirteen years, it has been struggle trying to make it her home. She confesses that her earliest efforts to create a sense of belonging in this place only left her lost. She describes how an immigration officer made her feel humiliated as he scrutinized her passport and documents at the Toronto immigration lines even though she had been granted a permanent legal residence in US and she had all the necessary documents. With this narration of her encounter at the immigration, one can sense that she is troubled by struggle one has to go through while trying to make US his or her home.
Bookda describes how she went from being exorcized and coveted by her American counterparts to being despised and hated. She goes on to reveal how the anti-Iranian hostility rose to an extent that someone could tell her on her face to 'go back home' (p. 193). All along, she had to endure the humiliation, the pain, loneliness and the alienation in a country of her dreams.
Bookda recounts how as Young Iranians they were crazy about the west. During 1960s and 70s, she was exposed to the media deceit about America and she says that she spent months fantasizing about this place and imagining her life in America (p.194).
When she finally got the opportunity to live 'the American dream,' Bookda was to later realize that the mainstream patriarchal and racist culture will in no way let her to make America her home. Despite her frantic efforts to assimilate, act, look and sound like an American; she ended up losing her identity, which she is painfully trying to regain. However, Bookda considers her self lucky because at least, she has spent half of life at a place where she felt she belonged-a place she called home. Nevertheless, she continues to follow her heart to a place she can fully belong (p.196).